(Coins jingle in slot)
(Dialing)
(Phone rings)
Boss, um...
Something happened. What's wrong?
You'll have the item today,
just like we agreed.
It's as good as in your hands.
Nothing can go wrong.
You contemptible canine!
Don't call me canine!
Do you know the meaning of patience?
Silence! As long as dogs are involved,
anything can go wrong!
I'll take that as a "no."
Jeez, what a hothead!
(Coins jingle)
Ah... keep the quarter.
I am proud to present this special token...
Only in heaven can a bunch of squeaky-clean angels
get awards for being extra squeaky-clean.
(Ding)
And now, our final honoree,
voted most-rehabilitated
by our heavenly jury...
I wouldn't be caught dead
wearing one of those merit badges, eh, Carface?
Hey... shh!
A dog who's lifted himself up
from the depths of depravity,
who proves that every dog deserves a second chance...
Now I know why they call it eternity.
Everything here takes forever.
Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh!
Charlie, show some respect.
...for making the most of what he's had to work with,
this first-class, diamond-studded angel wing pin
goes to...
Carface Carruthers!
Huh?
What an honor! Ha.
You're too kind.
(Chorus sings)
I don't know what to say!
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
(Ding)
Bless you!
I only hope that our other angels...
Who have yet to distinguish themselves...
Soon follow your shining example.
Hey, remember, Charlie,
it never hurts to play the game.
Halo polisher.
(Fanfare)
Oh! Ah!
Whoa! I'm late!
(Grr)
That feels good.
♪ ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah ♪
♪ ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah ♪
♪ ah, ah ♪
Ya!
Oof!
(Awoo)
Sorry. Lousy brake pads.
Have the newcomers touched down yet?
Uh, no, not yet.
Oof!
Ah.
Put on some weight, huh, fluffy?
Check.
Move along.
Sorry, sir!
Check.
Check. Check.
Move along.
That's it. That's all dogs.
Hold it. Let me see that list.
There has to be more.
I'm expecting company.
(Awoo awoo)
Uh... Asta, Bandit, Bowser, Fido, Fifi,
Hound of Baskerville,
Pavlov Dog, Rex, Rover, Rufus,
Shatzi, Spot, and...
Itchy! Ho ho!
Oh, yeah. Right. He's right here on the list.
Where am I?
You old fleabag, you.
(Gags and gasps for air)
Charlie, is that you?
Charlie, it is you! Ha!
Charlie!
Gee, Itch, you shouldn't have.
Sorry, sir. You can't take it with you.
(Gasps)
Wait a minute. Ain't you, uh... dead?
Oh, yeah... as a dog that eats chicken bones.
Oh, so that means...
Uh-oh.
Welcome to paradise, Itch.
Come on.
I'll show you around.
You can Mark your territory.
Hey... uh, wait! Charlie!
♪ sing ♪
♪ hallelujah ♪
♪ sing hallelujah ♪
oh, this is...
Well, I never would have...
Imagine... ha ha ha!
Look at this!
Hey, Charlie, wait a minute. I'm not Itchy.
That's funny. You sure look like him.
No, I mean...
For the first time in my life,
I don't need to scratch!
This is heaven, Itch.
Fleas go to the other place.
Hey, Bubba,
how 'bout we go down to hog heaven
and get us some ribs?
Ha ha ha!
Everybody's flyin'.
Uh, d-does that mean...
Me, too?
Ha ha ha.
Oh, yeah. It's all part of the basic package.
I'm going to like it here, Charlie.
Believe me... it gets old fast.
Yeah, sure. Ha, ha, ha.
Whoa-oh! Ya! Ooh-ooh-ooh!
Whaddaya mean?
It's hard to explain, Itch.
This joint is supposed to have everything...
To be the best, but it's just too... I don't know...
It's... it's too...
♪ it's too heavenly here ♪
♪ it's too peaceful and paradise-like ♪
♪ straight and narrow ♪
♪ and much too nice-like ♪
♪ endlessly sunny and clear ♪
(belch) ♪ it's too heavenly here ♪
♪ it's too blissful to bear ♪
♪ calm and quiet ♪
♪ and much too mellow ♪
♪ all my brain cells ♪
♪ have turned to jell-o ♪
♪ every day feels like a year ♪
♪ it's too heavenly here ♪
ooh!
♪ I need some action ♪
♪ I need some juice ♪
♪ that crazy kinda feelin' ♪
♪ of playin' fast and loose ♪
♪ some razzle dazzle ♪
♪ and a little stress and strife ♪
♪ I gotta get some life in my life ♪
♪ but it's too heavenly here ♪
♪ there's no way ♪
♪ you can be a sinner ♪
♪ roll the dice ♪
♪ everyone's a winner ♪
♪ it's so legit and sincere ♪
♪ it's too heavenly here ♪
♪ what good's a hustler ♪
♪ without a scam? yeah, yeah ♪
♪ I'm wasted talent ♪
♪ that's all that I am ah, ah, ah ♪
♪ but this operator ♪
♪ is at the wrong address ♪
♪ 'cause there's nothin' to finagle ♪
♪ and no one to finesse ♪
♪ it's so heavenly here ♪
♪ ahh ♪
♪ pure and perfect, sublime and shining ♪
♪ every cloud has a silver lining ♪
♪ everyone's full of good cheer ♪
♪ it's so heavenly here ♪
♪ they're all so saintly ♪
♪ I just can't relate ♪
♪ there's gotta be an exit ♪
♪ through that pearly gate ♪
♪ behold the canine ♪
♪ who's been cut down in his prime ♪
♪ I may have done the crime ♪
♪ but I can't do the time ♪
♪ 'cause it's too heavenly here ♪
♪ all hallelujahs ♪
♪ and hosannas ♪
♪ it could drive anyone bananas ♪
♪ I'm going out of my head ♪
♪ this joint is deader than dead ♪
♪ I'll give you 8 to 3 ♪
♪ it's too heavenly ♪
♪ hallelujah hallelujah ♪
♪ hallelujah too heavenly here ♪
Charlie, you got to see a doctor.
Heh heh heh.
(Grunts)
Unh! Eee! Uhh!
Ahh!
Hee hee!
(Clunk)
Ah!
(Music)
Ooh... hey!
Ah. Ha ha ha! Baby...
You're my ticket to fame and fortune!
Aah!
This is not good!
(Ruff)
Aah!
Aah-ho-ho!
Aah!
Charlie, you're wrong about this place.
The flying alone
is worth the price of admission.
That's perfect for you.
But for me, there's still something missing.
Ooh! Charlie, look.
Look!
Quiet, quiet, quiet, everyone!
I've got terrible news!
Oh, yeah, the flying nun.
Gabriel's horn has fallen from heaven
and landed on Earth
in the heart of San Francisco.
Oh! No! This is terrible!
But without the horn,
the pearly gates can't be opened.
And no more dogs would get into heaven!
Lucky dogs.
Reginald, you're our most-decorated angel.
I need you to go back to Earth
go back! To retrieve it.
Anabelle, I would consider it a great...
Whoa, time out!
You can't send Reggie.
Look at him, for heaven's sake!
They got rats down there bigger than this.
He's right! I'll go!
We are talking the mean streets
of frisco here, Ace, not mount happy-go-lucky.
Send me, Anna...
Anabelle, you'll need someone who can zip there and back
before big Gabe finds his horn missing...
Someone who knows the ropes and the dopes, someone...
Just like you.
Me? Well, I don't know.
I'd have to check with my people and get back to you.
Oh, what the heck?
I'll do it.
Maybe you can do something
besides make a nuisance of yourself.
Right, right. I'll be in touch.
Hold it!
To find the horn, follow your ears.
It gives off a steady, heavenly tone
that only angels can hear.
Only angels. Got it.
Wait, wait, wait! You're on your own.
I can give you one miracle
to be used only in an emergency.
Ooh!
One per customer. Got it.
Charles, Charles, Charles!
This is serious!
If the horn falls into the wrong hands,
it could mean disaster for us all!
You can count on Charles.
Oh, just to make sure,
I'm sending Itchy along with you.
Oh, no! But... I just got here!
Wait just a sec...
I... I still have death lag!
Whoo!
Yahoo!
I just remembered... I have flying lessons after lunch!
Bring back the horn, Charles!
Otherwise, there'll be heaven to pay!
Got... it!
Aah! Whoo! Whoo!
Ah ha ha!
Whoo hoo! Whoo hoo!
Look at this mess, Itch.
Trash, exhaust fumes,
graffiti!
We are home!
(Ding ding)
You're tellin' me!
(Sniff sniff sniff)
Ha-lo!
Double chili cheeseburger
with onions and pickles!
Charlie! Stay!
Look, we find Gabriel's horn
and then it's straight back to heaven. OK?
What's the hurry, Itch?
Let's have some fun.
Charlie, wait!
Wiener dog, here.
Oh, my legs are short!
So let's hear it for Kiko and his jazz mongrels.
They're great, aren't they?
I.D.?
I don't need no stinkin' dog tags!
(Sniff sniff)
(Awoo)
Classy place. They check for worms.
Nice toss, big guy.
♪ but fate throwed me a bone ♪
♪ she walked into my life ♪
♪ like the Princess she was ♪
♪ and she didn't have even ♪
♪ a half inch of fuzz ♪
♪ my pals call me crazy ♪
♪ but I couldn't care less ♪
♪ 'cause I'd fallen hard for an Afghan hairless... ♪
full house!
Ho ho ho!
Guess that's why they call me lucky.
All right, boys. Name your game.
Poker, double deuce, 52-card pickup?
I'm just yanking your leash.
Hold that thought.
♪ how her skin glistened ♪
♪ in the moonlight ♪
♪ and she loved my singin' ♪
♪ said it sounded just pretty good. ♪
♪ my pals called me... ♪
Hey, bartender.
How about a frosty one for the Chuckmeister?
Root beer, Itch?
Ah! Huh?
Yo, sparky!
Hey, what am I, invisible?
I'll just help myself!
Yee-haw!
What?
Charlie, look!
We ain't... ooh!
We're ghosts!
Anabelle!
Of all the rotten tricks!
Charles...
You've been down there for almost half an hour.
We're waiting!
Ooh hoo!
(Coughs)
♪ deedle dee hoo ♪
♪ deedle dodle deedle ♪
♪ deedle dee hoo ♪
thanks, jingles!
Really knocked 'em dead.
(Clap clap)
(Clap... clap)
(Clap clap)
(Buzz) (Clap clap)
(Eee)
Let's have a warm round of applause
for our next contestant...
Miss Sasha la Fleur.
(Scattered applause)
(Piano opening music)
♪ if you got romance ♪
♪ on your mind ♪
♪ if you'd like to stroll ♪
♪ hand in hand ♪
♪ if you want to cuddle ♪
♪ in the moonlight ♪
♪ and whisper ♪
♪ "ain't love grand?" ♪
♪ if you want someone ♪
♪ to buy that sweet talk ♪
♪ that you guys all love to spout ♪
(audience howling)
♪ baby ♪
♪ count me out ♪
♪ if you want to dance ♪
♪ cheek to cheek ♪
♪ then go home and talk ♪
♪ all night long ♪
♪ if you want to send somebody flowers ♪
♪ and share a stupid song ♪
♪ if you want a woman ♪
♪ who believes that ♪
♪ you're what her life's all about ♪
♪ baby ♪
♪ count me out... ♪
Ohhh.
♪ I been there ♪
♪ I've done that ♪
♪ it's nowhere ♪
♪ it's old hat ♪
♪ forget those thoughts ♪
♪ you're thinking, mister ♪
♪ and just regard me ♪
♪ as your sister ♪
♪ if you want to send ♪
♪ valentines ♪
♪ if you want to write ♪
♪ poetry ♪
♪ here's a little change ♪
♪ go call somebody ♪
♪ who doesn't look like me ♪
♪ and if you've got plans ♪
♪ to fall in love ♪
♪ without a shadow ♪
♪ of a doubt ♪
♪ baby ♪
♪ count me out ♪
♪ that's what I said ♪
♪ I said ♪
♪ baby ♪
♪ count me out ♪
♪ hound dog ♪
(cheering and whistling)
Itch, my heart is beating
a million miles an hour.
I can hardly breathe.
Maybe it was the change in altitude.
Ooh. My ears popped. Did your ears pop?
Now I know what I was missing in heaven.
I got to meet her.
She can't see you. You're an angel.
Quit reminding me.
Heh heh. You're back in circulation, huh, Charlie?
Oh, yeah. My circulation's fine.
Hello, Carface.
Carface!
Ha ha ha.
I heard you was in the neighborhood.
Yeah. I got time off for good behavior.
What are you doing here?
Missionary work.
Hey. I'll take one of them.
Ha ha ha.
She can't hear you.
That'll be 2 bits, Carface.
Put it on my tab.
Huh?
As long as I'm wearing this baby
I'm flesh and blood.
Where'd you get it?
A buddy of mine has them.
So, introduce us.
Charlie, you can't trust Carface.
He shouldn't have got into heaven in the first place.
(Coughs)
My mistake.
(Coughing)
I just thought you'd like to meet the lovely lady.
Hold it, Carface. Hold on.
What about the horn?
Hey, we'll get it later.
Lead on, pal.
Charlie! Wait!
Short legs, short legs.
Charlie.
Charlie...
Wait for me.
(Sirens)
How much further here, Carface?
Ah.
We're... we're almost there.
(Grunting)
Charlie?
Charlie.
Itchy, you're out of breath
and the fun hasn't even started yet.
Charlie, I got a bad feeling about this.
Relax.
I got it under control.
Boys, we're here.
Heh heh heh heh.
Hey, Red!
He must be in the back.
Have a look around.
Whoo! Aah!
Ooh hoo.
Ooh hoo hoo.
(Wicked cackling)
(Woof woof)
Whoo aah!
Ooga booga. Aah!
(Monkey noises)
Ha ha ha ha.
(Panting)
You trying to scare me to death?
Don't sweat it, pal.
You're already dead.
(Carface laughing)
Itch...
Come here.
I want to read your fortune.
I see you going for a long walk.
Yeah... on a short leash.
You're in the wrong seat.
Move it.
Carface...
That's no way to treat customers.
(Panting)
Red, I'd like you to meet
a couple friends of mine.
Charlie Barkin.
Itchy Itchiford.
Welcome.
Wait, wait. How can he...
Red sees all and knows all.
Ah... ahh... ah-choo.
You got cats around here or what?
Cats! Oh, good heavens, no.
The boys have come to do some shopping.
Carface tells us you've got special collars.
Collars.
Oh, yes.
They're going to be the next big thing.
Here.
Enjoy.
What's the catch, old man?
No catch.
Any friend of Carface
is a friend of mine.
There is one small thing.
I knew it! We're out of here,
right, Charlie?
The collars are only good
until sundown tomorrow.
After that, you'll be... shall we say...
Insubstantial again.
By then I'll have Sasha begging for me.
Yeow. Hey!
Oof!
Ah. Perfect fit.
Ahh... Ah-choo!
Feels great to be back in the flesh.
Whoa! Ooh.
How many?
Ah-choo!
Infested again.
Oh! Yeow. Ooh, get off.
Everybody off!
And don't forget...
Sundown tomorrow.
Zzz... yetty...
Ah-choo!
Jeez.
Jeez...
Hey!
Hey, Red...
I owe you one.
(Claws scratching crystal ball)
You'll owe me one, all right.
They fell for it!
Ha ha ha ha ha.
When we get that horn,
we can open any safe
or bank vault in the world.
Ha ha!
Silence!
Uhhh...
I didn't recruit you
for such entry-level wickedness.
You have so much to learn.
♪ now I know you've been malicious ♪
♪ spiteful, and a trifle vicious ♪
♪ it's no secret that you've cheated ♪
♪ and you've lied ♪
♪ and you've done some double-dealing ♪
♪ scheming, swindling, and stealing ♪
♪ you're an amateur ♪
♪ but heaven knows you've tried... ♪
I answered your ad, didn't I?
Money, power, stature. Call 1-800-brimstone.
Good boy.
And very soon your efforts will be rewarded.
♪ you'll develop so much faster ♪
♪ now you're working with a master ♪
♪ who will help you cultivate ♪
♪ your darker side ♪
♪ you'll discover wicked ways ♪
♪ you've never known before ♪
♪ and you'll find that when ♪
♪ you're really rotten to the core ♪
♪ it feels so good to be bad ♪
♪ so delicious to be ♪
♪ a despicable cad ♪
♪ it's just so thrilling ♪
♪ and so fulfilling ♪
♪ to give somebody ♪
♪ the worst time they've ever had ♪
♪ it feels so good to be bad... ♪
Case in point...
♪ Charlie doesn't know it ♪
♪ but he's in my power ♪
♪ he's gonna wish that he was never born ♪
♪ I promise you that by the sunset hour ♪
♪ I'll have Gabriel's horn... ♪
Boss, why can't I get it for you?
♪ 'cause ♪
♪ you had your chance and blew it ♪
♪ I entrusted you to do it ♪
♪ but you bungled it ♪
♪ and threw your chance away ♪
♪ it's a problem you created ♪
♪ if the horn can't be located ♪
♪ I'm not naming names ♪
♪ but someone has to pay... ♪
Aah!
I could try again, boss!
You'll never find it.
Only angels can hear it's heavenly tone.
But I'm an angel.
Not anymore.
You work for me now.
Aah!
♪ though you gave me cause to doubt you ♪
♪ there's a loathsomeness about you ♪
♪ that attracts me to you ♪
♪ as a protege ♪
♪ and when you've learned every creepy ♪
♪ crummy thing I know ♪
♪ you'll taste the joy ♪
♪ that comes when you're the lowest of the low ♪
♪ it feels so good to be bad ♪
♪ so delightful ♪
♪ to be a deplorable cad ♪
♪ it's so appealing ♪
♪ to have the feeling ♪
♪ that what you're doing ♪
♪ gets trouble brewing ♪
♪ and drives everybody mad ♪
♪ you've got my guarantee ♪
♪ it feels so good ♪
♪ to be bad... ♪
Oh! Whoa!
(Red laughing)
So exciting!
Ole.
So inviting.
♪ so good to be bad ♪
bah ha!
Whoo.
♪ if you got romance ♪
♪ on your mind ♪
♪ ya da ta da da ♪
you sing pretty good for a stray.
Can I have my prize now?
Oh. What?
You advertised a meal for the winner.
If it's a meal you want, I'm off at 10:00.
Honey, I'd rather eat out of the garbage.
Hey, uh...
That's what I had in mind.
Huh. Bonsoir, Frenchy.
It's your lucky night.
(Lips smacking)
Pedigree?
You show me yours,
and I'll show you mine.
What do you serve with that shake, baby?
Ahhh.
This is going to be fast, right?
We got a horn to find.
Ah. Take notes, Itch.
(Charlie gargling)
Ah.
You're about to watch a master.
You must hear this all the time...
But you sing like an angel.
Excuse me.
The name's Barkin... Charlie Barkin.
And you are?
Not even remotely interested.
Oh. That's a mouthful.
Down boy. Let me help.
Ah, come on. Give me that.
No, please. It's no problem.
Whoops.
Hey, sister.
No free eats.
I'll take care of it.
Put it on Carface's tab.
OK.
Now... where were...
Huh?
Hey, Charlie...
(giggles)
I noted how you swept the lady off her feet.
So, I'm rusty.
Let's make a little home delivery.
(Groans)
I'll never get back to heaven.
Oh-ho, shucks.
(Sighs)
Something tells me you're forgetting about the horn.
Would you take it easy?
There's plenty of time for that. Come on.
Anabelle is not going to like this, Charlie.
Hey.
Nice digs, huh, Itch?
Grrrrrr!
Wow!
You! What do you want?
You left your doggy bag.
Oh, right. Um, thanks.
Thanks a lot.
There's more than enough.
If you want some company, we could stick around.
Sorry, I've got a kid.
Uh, yeah, but, uh...
I'm good with kids.
(Yawns)
Whoa. She's got a "kid" kid.
Thanks, girl.
What did he do, follow you home?
Aah! You can talk?
Please, don't encourage him.
Aah! Whoa!
He understands you? Of course he can.
Holy cow!
Holy dogs, actually.
I'm Charlie. He's Itchy.
What's going on here?
And I want the truth.
The truth?
I'm... an...
Angel.
Oh, boy.
Come on.
Somebody's playing a trick.
OK. OK. If I'm not an angel,
how can I do this!
(Charlie grunts)
Whew. Wait a minute.
Run, jump, fly?
What did I forget?
Of course.
Watch this, kid.
Aah!
Please...
Hold your applause.
Ta-da!
Wow! That was the best trick I've ever seen.
Trick?
I do magic, too.
Give me the ball, boy.
Wow! That was... that was...
Real... I can't... more.
More.
The kid's good.
Listen...
I could help with his technique.
Houdini.
That little boy is lost.
If you want to help, ask him where he lives.
(Itchy laughing)
Charlie, look.
It's a miracle.
Why not ask him yourself?
Now, that would be a miracle.
One miracle, coming up.
Of all the arrogant, presumptuous,
egotistical mutts I've ever met.
Now you talk.
(Gasps) You must be an angel.
Hey, Charlie,
you used up your miracle,
and that was for an emergency.
It seemed like an emergency.
You must be my guardian angel.
Your what? Your what?
My mom said everyone has a guardian angel.
You're here because I ran away from home, right?
Uh, sure. Right, kid.
We're going to make some team, huh?
You mean, you're not lost?
Not anymore.
I got my guardian angel.
Hold it. Why'd you run away?
You tell her.
This ought to be good.
It's, um...
Um, uh...
You're having, uh...
Ha ha...
Kid problems?
Yeah, with my step-mom.
Knew it. Eh, I knew it.
She wants me to call her mom,
but she's not.
I'm never going home again.
Do you plan to live on the street?
Yep.
And do my magic at cannery square.
Tourists give you money.
Now, you know that's silly.
Come on. Tell me where you live.
No!
OK. Don't listen to me.
Listen to your guardian angel.
David, cannery square sounds...
Like a good plan.
What?
Don't listen to him!
He's not ready to go home.
Come on. He's only 8 years old.
That's 56 in dog years.
Who knows where your talent will take you.
Oh, please.
No. You must have faith.
Guardian angels move in mysterious ways.
So we're off to cannery square?
Not cannery square.
Easy street.
Yes!
You with us, Sasha?
I don't know what you're up to,
but I'm watching you.
I wouldn't want it any other way.
Charles!
We've got a traffic jam up here.
New arrivals can't get in.
We need that horn.
Put them on a holding pattern.
I'm really onto something here.
Wha... wha... wha...
What?
(Splash)
Ooh. You're going to love this place, boss.
It's got everything you wanted.
Beachfront location, fenced yard,
tight security.
The joint's been home to some great pedigrees.
Capone...
Machine-gun Kelly...
The bird dog of Alcatraz.
Oh ho.
(Squeaks)
(Red growling)
All that...
And ratatouille, too.
(Squeaks)
(Crunching)
Then I did good?
Have a bone.
(Trolley car bell clanging)
David: Which way to cannery square?
Charlie: Uh, just follow your nose.
(Construction machines making noise)
So, is there a Mr. Sasha?
Nope, and I'm not taking applications.
OK, OK. But if you were,
what, uh... What qualities would you be looking for?
Oh, I don't know.
Ah, of course you do.
Hmm.
Well...
Loyalty,
strength,
breeding...
I'd be good at that.
Humility.
Hmm.
Compassion...
Oh!
And of course, style.
Look out!
Charlie, you OK?
Boy...
Are my ears ringing.
Yeah, you're right.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
That's not your ears, Charlie, that's...
Oh, that's got to be...
The horn.
Look, Charlie...
There it is.
Go get it, Itch.
I'll stay here... with Sasha.
Uh-uh. That's your job. I'll stay with Sasha.
Hmm.
OK. Be back before you can say hallelujah.
Where's he going?
Um, confidential guardian angel business.
(Bars slam shut)
You dogs have enjoyed a state of grace
for far too long.
Wouldn't you agree, Carface?
Uh, yeah...
Whatever you say, boss.
All these cells...
Filled with dogs.
Can you see it?
Huh?
Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure.
And me playing Gabriel's horn!
Can you hear it?
Oh, sure. Just, uh,
put your lips together and blow.
And then...
The grand finale!
Oh, um, that ain't, uh,
that's not coming in so clear, actually.
Oh, it will.
And all thanks to Charlie Barkin.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Make sure he doesn't disappoint me.
You got it, boss.
♪ it's so, so stirring ♪
♪ I feel like purring ♪
♪ it's deeply pleasin' ♪
♪ to be the reason ♪
♪ so many will be so sad ♪
♪ 3 cheers for treachery ♪
♪ it feels so good to be bad ♪
bah ha!
Let's go.
Step through. Good boy.
Nice little dog there.
(Panting)
Get this, Mcdowell.
"Man finds genie in his vacuum cleaner."
Last week you believed that scientists created intelligent lunch meat.
That's why everyone's afraid
to ride in a car with you.
Hey, sarge, you got a lost-and-found here?
(Burps) Room 112 through the squad room.
(Clicks tongue) 10-4.
I'm telling you, Mcdowell,
there are some mighty weird things in this world.
Any ideas why he ran away?
It could only be one thing.
We're having a baby,
and David got very upset when I told him.
(Blows sour note)
Huh?
(Zip) Whoo!
(Chuckling)
I can't believe this.
Now, where'd I put that lost-and-found list?
Come to Charlie.
Ohh! Duhh!
Huh?
Oh.
Of course, it couldn't be Gabriel's flute
or Gabriel's kazoo. No.
(Sniffing)
Thanks, officer Reyes.
Don't worry. We'll find your little boy.
Itchy, where is he, and what's this all about?
Sorry, can't.
Charlie and I are sworn to secrecy.
My lips... these lips right here...
Well, they're sealed.
Itchy...
Mm-mmm-mm-mmm-mm.
Miss me?
Charlie! Ha ha!
Uhh!
So, where's the you-know-what?
Minor setback, Itch.
We're just going to have to bust it out.
It? What it?
Charlie, no.
Well...
(crunch) Yeow!
Charlie, don't give away the "it."
You ever hear of Gabriel's horn?
(Stammering)
All right, here's the plan.
(Whispering)
Heh heh heh heh!
Just keep moving.
Doing great.
Act like you belong here.
Just through the door.
I don't think this is going to work.
Nobody even sees us. No eye contact.
Am I good, or what?
(Growling) Ho!
(Grr)
Aah!
Don't you... what did you do?
(Barking)
(Officer shouting)
Uh-oh. Plan "B," guys.
Doughnuts! Fresh off the truck!
Doughnuts!
Look out!
Yahoo!
Ohh! Oh!
Somebody get that mutt!
Hey! Hey! Come back here!
Hey! Whoa!
Get over here!
He's headed for the file... Whoa!
Aah!
Oh, no!
Somebody help me!
Ooh! Ooh!
File this!
(Ringing)
Aah!
(Glug glug glug)
Ooh! Uhh!
Oof! Uhh!
Oops. Sorry, officer.
We got you.
(Gurgling) OK, son.
Give up the keys.
You heard him, little man.
Nothing up my sleeve, sir.
What? What?
Officer, what's that behind your ear?
Thank you. Thank you.
You've been a great audience.
(Gurgling) Come on!
Uhh! Uhh!
Mission accomplished.
Come on!
Oh... ohh!
Ooh!
(Speaking Spanish)
Oh, my gosh. David!
Uh... uh... David!
Freeze! Sit!
Stay!
Whoa!
What the...
Move! Move! Move!
Stop that kid!
And those dogs!
Kick it, Charlie!
You don't have a license to do that!
Ohh!
Hey! Short legs!
Aah!
It's the dog pound for sure!
Whoa! (Car starts)
(Tires squeal)
Jump, Itch.
Aah-aah!
(Tires squealing)
Aah!
Whoo!
Ooh! Ah! Ooh!
Yahoo!
Wow! Aren't guardian angels
supposed to protect people?
Hey, it's my first day on the job.
(Grunting)
(Siren) Aah!
Whoa!
(Tires squealing)
I'm going to barf.
Yee-ha!
Having fun, are we?
Hah!
Aah!
(Air bag hisses)
Eee, naranja.
Aah!
You finally got your flying lessons, eh, Itch?
I'm going to get you for this, Charlie.
Aw, what do you mean,
we're not going back yet?
We got the horn, don't we?
Come on. Let's get out of here.
I still need to take care of David.
I am his guardian angel.
Sure. And Sasha has nothing to do with it.
Well, uh...
Charlie, you're making me crazy here.
Just a little more time.
The horn will be safe here.
No! Charlie!
Wouldn't you rather be home right now, David?
Uh-uh. Not that again.
I'm going to cannery square.
Don't you mean... Easy street?
Yeah. How far is it?
A lot closer than you think.
(Music playing)
You nervous?
A little. And sweaty.
Well, don't be.
Excited?
You bet.
Now, Charlie.
It's OK. All set.
Let's go.
Whah!
Ha ha ha ha!
♪ outta his way ♪
♪ he's comin' through ♪
♪ the kid's makin' his show biz debut ♪
♪ you'll be amazed, amused, enthused ♪
♪ and bowled over ♪
♪ I've got the moves, I've got the tricks ♪
♪ I've been practicin' since I was 6 ♪
♪ his dues are paid, he's got it made ♪
♪ soon we'll be in clover ♪
♪ easy street ♪
♪ where the sun's always shinin' ♪
♪ not a cloud in the sky ♪
♪ clear and sunny ♪
♪ milk and honey ♪
♪ life is sweet ♪
♪ on easy street... ♪
Charlie, I hope you know what you're doing.
Relax. Enjoy the show.
It ain't over yet.
Hmph.
♪ when you're a big celebrity ♪
♪ fans are like a family ♪
♪ abracadabra... poof! ♪
♪ I'll be a sensation ♪
♪ and I'll be there through thick and thin ♪
♪ watchin' the dough come rollin' in ♪
♪ a couple of shows and then we'll close ♪
♪ and take our vacation ♪
♪ on easy street ♪
♪ where the sun's always shinin' ♪
♪ not a cloud in the sky ♪
♪ good-time livin' ♪
♪ it's a given ♪
♪ we'll all meet ♪
♪ on easy street ♪
♪ where we'll be together ♪
♪ best friends to the end ♪
♪ I'll be applauded and admired ♪
♪ there's easy pickin's ♪
♪ and boneless chickens ♪
♪ wishing is all that's required ♪
♪ on easy street ♪
♪ where the sun's always shinin' ♪
♪ not a cloud in the sky ♪
♪ clear and sunny ♪
♪ milk and honey ♪
♪ good-time livin' ♪
♪ it's a given ♪
aah!
♪ easy street ♪
♪ where the sun's always shinin' ♪
♪ not a cloud in the sky ♪
♪ no good-byes there ♪
♪ no one cries there ♪
♪ you can't beat ♪
♪ life on easy ♪
♪ street ♪
Come on. Let's get you out of the rain.
(Sniffles)
One, please.
(Mom chuckles) Thank you.
I'm so hungry, I could eat a shoe.
How about you?
I thought so. I'll be right back.
My mom used to do that.
Charlie...
Can she see me from heaven?
Of course she can, kiddo.
David, remember,
you still have your dad and step-mom.
My step-mom doesn't want me.
She's having her own kid.
Parents can love more than one pup.
Maybe she just didn't know how to tell you that.
Maybe you should give her another chance.
I ran away from home when I was little.
That make your parents sorry?
I don't know. I never saw them after that.
I guess I could have used a guardian angel, huh?
Charlie, I'll go home...
If you promise to take me.
I promise.
Really? That would be great.
You can sleep on my bed, and we'll play in the yard.
We'll be one big family.
David, hold on. I can't promise that.
We struck gold! Egg foo Yung,
mu shu pork, wonton,
and I hope you like potstickers.
Ha ha! Napkins?
(Birds cawing)
Ahh!
Get... what...
(cawing)
Nice work, Charlie Barkin.
You really are an angel.
No, I'm not.
Not a guardian angel, anyway.
What you did for David was wonderful.
I'm not his angel.
I'm just an errand boy
sent to fetch Gabriel's horn.
Sasha, my whole life
had been about making and breaking promises.
And now I'm going to do it again.
You can't take him home?
I have to go back.
Just when I finally found someone special.
Oh, Charlie.
♪ I will always be with you ♪
♪ makes no difference where your road takes you to ♪
♪ even if we're apart ♪
♪ now we're joined at the heart ♪
♪ though our moment may be gone ♪
♪ you and I will still live on ♪
♪ I will always be with you ♪
♪ I'll be by your side ♪
♪ whatever you do ♪
♪ other memories may fade ♪
♪ but the ones that we made ♪
♪ are eternal as a star ♪
♪ now I'm part of who you are ♪
♪ and I'll be there with you ♪
♪ in the sound of your laughter ♪
♪ I'll be in the tears you cry ♪
♪ 'cause the way you and I ♪
♪ have touched one another ♪
♪ doesn't end with good-bye ♪
♪ I will always be with you ♪
♪ like a guardian angel ♪
♪ constant and true ♪
♪ when you're lost in the night ♪
♪ and you can't see the light ♪
♪ my love will see you through ♪
♪ I will always be there ♪
♪ you'll have me there ♪
♪ I will always be with ♪
♪ you ♪
Charlie?
Oh, no, no.
Not now.
Sasha! I can't find Itchy. Where's Charlie?
David, I'm here.
Right here.
He's gone.
He wouldn't leave.
He's my guardian angel.
We got to do something.
They'll be fine, Charlie.
I promised David I'd get him home.
Short legs. Ooh.
I guess I'm short.
Charlie!
Hey, you got any 6s?
Go fish.
(Humming)
(Ticking)
Red! Yaah-ha!
Red. Heh.
I gotta... I gotta ask a favor.
Anything, Charlie.
Just name it.
I need a new collar.
You enjoyed it.
I knew you would.
Oh, thanks. You're a pal.
Can I have it now?
Oh... I am sorry.
You misunderstood me.
If you want another collar, you must pay.
Oh. Heh.
You caught me a little short.
How about a... an IOU?
I don't think so.
Carface will show you out.
There must be some way to make a deal.
Uh... Charlie.
He, uh, he might take a trade.
Wait. Wait.
Good-bye.
Red?
I have...
This horn.
Sorry. I'm not musical.
No. This is much more than a horn, Red.
There's nothing like it in the whole world.
Let me sleep on it.
I don't have that kind of time.
I like your spirit, Charlie.
Bring me this horn, and you can have the collar.
Right.
Uh... I need the collar to get it.
Oh, really?
(Panting)
Come on, Red, you can trust me.
This isn't about trust.
A deal with me is binding.
Charlie!
No!
Deal?
(Evil laugh)
Huh? Huh?
Ha ha ha ha! Aah!
Aaahhh!
(Roar)
Waah-hah!
I guess that cat's out of the bag, eh?
Ha ha ha ha ha!
You tricked me.
Uhh!
Now, be a good little bow-wow...
And fetch me my horn.
Oh! Charlie!
Follow him.
(Sniffing)
(Train approaching)
Where are you going, Charlie?
To the train station.
Uhh! Charlie!
Are you nuts?
You... you gave away the horn.
Get out of my way.
You shook on it. You made a deal with him.
You promised Anabelle.
And you promised me, Charlie.
I know that,
but right now, I've got to find David.
Move!
(Train approaching)
Come on, David. Which train?
Where's Charlie?
He wouldn't leave me.
Huh?
David?
Rarrhh!
(Muffled) Aah!
Bring the item to Alcatraz in one hour,
or junior here
doesn't have a prayer.
Ha ha ha ha!
Charlie!
(Panting)
Where is he?
The hour's up.
You know what they say, boss. Patience is...
Rrrahhh!
Ohh! Ohh! Ohh!
Uh... maybe he's stuck in traffic.
What kind of dog are you,
selling out to some mangy old cat?
Quiet, or I'll have your tongue, boy.
Red?
Charlie.
The horn.
Let me, boss.
I'll fetch it for you.
Aah!
Gabriel's horn is finally mine.
Boss, they're hitting the bricks!
Let them.
I have what I want.
(Blows horn)
Ha ha ha ha hah!
Arrrgh!
Ha ha ha ha!
Silence!
(Rattling)
Huh?
(Awoo) (Awoo)
(Blows horn)
Ah ha ha ha ha ha!
(Horn blows)
(Barking)
Charlie, what's happening?
Don't worry about it. Let's get out of here!
(Horn blows)
(Angelic singing)
(Roar)
Aah! Aah! Aah!
(Shouting and screaming)
Ah ha ha ha ha!
Come on! Jump!
Aah!
(Angelic singing)
Charles, what have you done?
Charlie, we got to do something.
No, Itch, it's my fault.
I'm the one who's got to do something...
Get David home safely.
Charlie!
No!
Ah!
(Rahhrr)
Red, Charlie's coming back!
Heh heh heh heh heh.
That puppy's into punishment.
(Rahhrr) Oof!
It's a cat's world now!
Aah!
(Rahhrr)
Let him go!
Yaah! Run, David!
(Creaking)
Huh?
No!
David!
All right, you! I'm coming!
Aah!
Huh?
Which do you want...
The horn...
Or your friends?
Itchy! Help us!
Everyone, scatter!
Come back here!
(Rahhrr)
Play the horn, Charles. The horn!
Charlie!
Whoa!
(Rahhrr)
Uh! Uh!
This should cool him off.
Aaaahh.
Take a bath!
Red: Enough stupid pet tricks!
Aah!
(Grr) Huh?
Here, kitty, kitty.
I like your spirit.
Oops! Ha ha ha!
Hope you can dog paddle!
Charlie!
Yaaahhh!
Waaah!
Uh! Uh! Wha...
Whoa!
Ah! Ah! Aah!
(Horn plays 2 notes)
(Fanfare)
Aaah!
Aaaahh!
Ha-lo!
(Sniffs)
Double chili catburger with onions and pickles.
Everyone OK?
I think so. I'm fine.
I'm good.
Me, too.
(Grunting)
Where's Red?
His boss yanked his leash.
Ah, good riddance.
(Coughing)
Ptooey!
Charlie...
I hope you didn't take any of that personally.
I was just, you know, playing the game.
Sure, Carface.
Say, what did you trade Red for your collar?
He wanted the bottom of my shoes or something.
Ah ha ha! I don't even wear shoes. Stupid cat.
Stupid dog!
It was your soul!
(Mreow) (Mreow)
Ah! Let me go!
Uh! Uh! This is not good.
Yikes! Not the flames.
No, no! Not the flames.
What do you know?
And I thought all dogs go to heaven.
Anabelle.
Come on, Charlie. Time to go.
Already?
David... can Sasha take you home?
Charlie...
Don't go.
Hey...
I'll always be your guardian angel.
(Sniffle)
OK.
(Sigh)
Sasha...
I love you.
I love you, too, Charlie.
Hey... what's wrong?
Is this thing stuck between floors?
I'll take the horn from here, Charles.
What? Afraid I'll drop it?
Hmm. (Gasp)
Whoa! Ooh!
Ahh. Ohh.
(Sigh)
There's someone who still needs
to go back where he belongs.
I already took care of David.
Not David.
You, Charlie.
For what you've done,
you deserve a second chance.
Claim this in, oh, say...
20 years?
You mean?
Mm-hmm.
Itchy, you hear that?
We're going back!
Nah.
Not this wiener dog.
See, when you can fly...
Short legs don't matter.
Ha ha!
I'm gonna miss you, pal.
I couldn't have done it without you.
Take care of yourself, buddy.
What... what is it, girl?
Can you believe it?
Charlie? Why, Charlie!
I got a weekend pass...
For the rest of my life.
Oh, Charlie.
David?
Thom, it's David!
Davey!
Ohh, David!
You're all right!
I've been worried sick about you.
You worried about me?
Of course.
Having this baby doesn't mean I don't love you.
I know that now...
Mom.
Honey, we're a family.
That's right. Just a bigger one.
Dad...
Mom...
Speaking of bigger families...
Do we have room for a pet or 2?
Tell me the truth, Charlie Barkin.
Why'd you really come back?
And don't con me.
Actually, I kind of like the idea of being Mr. Sasha.
Hey, guys!
I worked a little magic!
♪ now that you're lovin' me ♪
♪ it's so heavenly ♪
♪ hallelujah, hallelujah ♪
♪ hallelujah ♪
♪ so heavenly here ♪
♪ hallelujah ♪
♪ I will always be with you ♪
♪ makes no difference ♪
♪ where your road takes you to ♪
♪ even if we're apart ♪
♪ now we're joined at the heart ♪
♪ though our moment may be gone ♪
♪ you and I will still live on ♪
♪ I will always be with you ♪
♪ I'll be by your side ♪
♪ whatever you do ♪
♪ other memories may fade ♪
♪ but the ones that we made ♪
♪ are eternal as a star ♪
♪ now I'm part of who you are ♪
♪ and I'll be there with you ♪
♪ in the sound of your laughter ♪
♪ I'll be in the tears you cry ♪
♪ 'cause the way you and I ♪
♪ have touched one another ♪
♪ doesn't end with good-bye ♪
♪ I will always be with you ♪
♪ like a guardian angel ♪
♪ constant and true ♪
♪ when you're lost in the night ♪
♪ lost in the night ♪
♪ and you can't see the light ♪
♪ my love will see you through ♪
♪ I will always be there ♪
♪ you'll have me there ♪
♪ I will always be with you ♪
♪ like a guardian angel ♪
♪ constant and true ♪
♪ when you're lost in the night ♪
♪ lost in the night ♪
♪ and you can't see the light ♪
♪ can't see the light ♪
♪ my love will see you through ♪
♪ I will always be there ♪
♪ yeah, I'll be there ♪
♪ I will always be with ♪
♪ you ♪